Spa Masutra: A Guide to Spas in India by Devanshi Mody

Spas are a professional hazard, I say. But if one is to have them inflicted upon one, (alas…) then in the land of the Kama Sutra spas are more than just tolerable, they can even be pleasurable. Try these new offerings. Quite spactacular. Come Valentine’s, to avoid heart break, have a spa break!

Venus in Varanasi

I went to Varanasi for New Year’s Eve. But the spiritually imbuing ancient city is no less astonishing a destination to head to over Valentine’s. Or indeed anytime. I wish I could live forever in Varanasi. You would too were you staying at the heartbreakingly beautiful Taj Nadesar Palace. Adorable in its intimacy, this little jewel is amongst my favourites in the casket of Taj palaces. An immaculate white façade sits prettily upon lush emerald expanses studded with a turquoise pool and a filigree of vibrant fauna. A paradise for bird watching- of every sort. So gentlemen, here’s incentive. And for the ladies, pink stand-alone bathtubs filled with luxury ayurveda products offer endless seductions. Not to mention sumptuously satined and silked four-poster beds. Nobody does interiors quite like the Taj does.

The contemporised palace yet highlights exquisite antiques and artefacts which fuse seamlessly with modern embellishments. Steeped in legend, this palace apparently witnessed the massacre of 150 natives by British soldiers during the 1857 Sepoy Mutiny. It is also where the Maharajas of Varanasi come to die (the present Maharaja’s father did not long ago). The 10-suite property that remains royally owned has hosted Queen Elizabeth II, Lord and Lady Mountbatten, Jawaharlal Nehru, the Last Shah of Iran etc.

And you will still see stars today, what with a quirky in-house astrologer who can on occasions be startlingly accurate in his predictions. Dare to find out if yours is a match made in heaven! If it isn’t, console yourself with the satvik thali designed straight to heaven. Well, maybe not quite straight, but the moderately spiced vegetarian cuisine is created to induce divine virtues. Perhaps not for those seeking to indulge valentine vices.

Mark Twain famously said that Varanasi is older than history. But Nadesar Palace’s dynamic young GM Somnath Mukheree and his youthful team infuse evergreen vigour to this deathless city. It is now even immortalised in a Brazilian soap opera called Varanasi and Brazilians descend en masse in Varanasi seeking cures for the minutest ailments. Therapeutic luxury spas do not partake of traditional Benarasi healing practices. But one must move with and heal according to the times. So, when it’s Spa time, Mr Mukherjee unveils the delicious Jiva Spa which is like a private home and comes with chandeliers and what not, being set as it is in a palace.

Contemporary Flashes

But contemporary flashes are perceived in the relaxation area which showcases stunning telescopic photos of the celebrated Ganges Ghats. This room overlooks a serene inner courtyard and a glass-encased yoga room.  Mr Mukherjee next recommends the signature Abhisheka treatment. A two and half hour treatment. I panic. I like doing things, not having things done to me.

 But I must confess I enjoyed everything this treatment did to me... Sigh… The Abhisheka encapsulates the essence of India’s ancient ceremonial cleansing rituals and unfolds in a sensually fragranced, lamp-lit enclave. Descend into a sunken bath and sit on steps that evoke those of the ghats. Before you is an intricately crafted screen aglow. Soon you are covered and showered in natural products like curds, honey, sandals etc and washed away with warm Ganges water amidst entrancing Vedic chants. 

Then the demure therapist Linda who has the softest hands and slightest touch- yet what pressure she can muster-, does you the massage of a lifetime. Linda’s technical perfection amazes. Here is an experience in genteelness and gentleness. I am convinced this is the best spa in the world. And if you get addicted to the Vedic chanting as I did, well, you cannot buy a CD of it, the music being exclusive to the spa. I suppose you’ll have to keep going back for more and more Abhishekas. I know I will.

Tented Temptations

Conde Nast Traveller just voted the inimitable Taj Rambagh Palace the World’s Best Hotel. Rightfully. The all-suite palace set in 47 acres, formerly home to the late Raj Mata Gayatri Devi, does ravishingly right royal suites with private Jacuzzis, unimaginable pampering service and what not. But take time to emerge from your possessive suites to check into the Jiva Grand Spa encrusted in gorgeous, fountained landscaped gardens. Extraordinary are the tented therapy suites, each with its own outdoor relaxation veranda including exquisitely crafted swing and traditional bed.

Eco friendly materials make up the ultra luxury tents swathed in soft strains of music and hypnotic fragrances. Try the signature body wrap: after a scrub with ayurvedic products you’re mummified in a sheets and unwound before a copper tub filled with a million rose petals. After a long languish you bathe in milk (who said Cleopatra invented the milk bath?). Then comes the massage.

Finally, relaxation with herbal teas and fresh fruit in possibly the  most enchanting relaxation area on earth. In the evenings a live musician strums a sitar sitting in a pavilion adorned with an exuberance of flora. Before him dance rose petals on fountains in a garden lit with candles. Forget the Garden of Eden. This is paradisiacal!

Spa-rtan Splendour

If you like to live on love and fresh air and spa therapies head to hilltop heritage Fateh Garh that just launched its new Sansha Spa. Fateh Garg probably has the only spa where experience by day and night differ dramatically. Being naughty by night is always more fun, of course. This will also liberate your days to avail of the cultural excursions the hotel can organise to some of the region's most magnificent monuments including the world-famous 800 year-old sculpted marble temples at Dilwara and Ranakpur, ancient rock temples at Eklingji and Nath Dwara and staggering forts like Chittod Garh and Kumbal Garh.

Ensure a picnic somewhere is thrown in too. The extremely amiable young Dushyant Sigh will whisk you on super safaris and entertain you with his subtle humour. Over a seven night itinerary you can return to languish your evenings away in the spa. Immense antique doors open into the spa. Levitating above you is a marvellous mural from legends of Krishna, this one appositely romantic and depicting the playful god stealing the clothes of bathing milk maids. Quite a revelation!

In the couples suites indulge in multifarious massages performed with natural oils including exotica like lotus, rose, volcanic extracts or even coffee beans. The all natural ayurveda facials are a must-do and include sea shell scrubs and orchid oils. These therapies will now be available on the second of the three-tiered terraces that cascade down the hill.

The spa terrace has its own restaurant whilst the new pool on the lowest terrace is for noisier elements that mayn't accede to the exclusive hilltop infinity pool. The spa itself boasts a free-standing marble Jacuzzi sitting before arches that frame incredible views. There's only one Jacuzzi so ensure you book it. Jumping in as a couple would be a bit of a squeeze. So dispatch the Loved One on a wonder and hook up with the scenery for company. Rather nice to have Udaipur down on its knee before you.

Sex & the City

The Park in Kolkata, one of India's most hip and happening city hotels, has had another happening. A new lobby, signature suites and a 24-hr restaurant courtesy of famous London-based designer Terence Conran. This chic Park Street address is the only hotel in the country with four night clubs and bars including Tantra, Roxy, Some Place Else and the slick poolside Aqua. Naturally, the party spots, which each play a different style of music, throb with the city's glam young things. This is the hotel's claim to fame.

What most don't know is that the hotel now participates in the just-inaugurated and very wonderful Kolkata Literary Festival. It also serves India's best pizzas at the newly launched Bridge (so thin and light you may have a couple of pizzas- yes, you may). The fusion restaurant Zen does super sushi but the Indian restaurant Saffron is for kebabs. As eating is an arduous task you will be exhausted. Then you must check into the oriental Aura Spa with its red hued suites where Thai therapists execute treatments with a South East Asian flavour. Try the facial.

Literary Love

Jaipur is where jet setters (the new breed of literati) head for the now internationally renowned and quite glamorous annual Literary Festival. The city is sold out. But despair not. About 30 KM outside the city Chomu Palace is an option. The 350-year-old heritage property was recently restored but not before it despaired as a grinding mill for about 60 years until the present owners took four years, 300 truckloads of rubbish and 70 bagsful of bats to re-instate the historic abode.

The adorable GM Mr Gurmeet Singh points out a certain part of the courtyard which integrates Rajputana, Moghul and Imperial architecture over three decks whilst the efficient front office manager Mr Sunil Nair exhibits placidity in  the face of the most demanding guests (ie me). Check into the Maharani Suite with emerald chandeliers and two arresting original frescos, including one on a scene of courtly love, should you require inspiration for your valentine ventures. The over adventurous will naturally require rejuvenation.

So after a dozen (at least) of gorgeous home-baked cookies, their Sansha Spa mightn't be especially smart but you do pass a rather delightful terraced garden and courtyard to access it and the therapists are competent. Ask for Sunanda who does great seaweed facials and Abhyanga ayurveda massages. However, Jaipur is the city of gems so the Gem Stone treatment might be the one to restore your sheen and glow (when it is available). All that glitters isn’t gold. But it could be the result of a spa-me-no-luxuries therapy!

Interested in your own spa retreat? Check out our listings of luxury hotels in India.