No Buyer’s Remorse in Bangkok by Belinda Jackson

Markets, department stores, street corners, entire suburbs of shops - Bangkok talks up its reputation as a shopping mecca. But is it all just puff? Take a squiz around the airport at the number of visitors arriving in the city with enormous, empty suitcases and there’s your question answered.

But before you leap into the fray with a virginal credit card, plan your Bangkok bazaar to include a Saturday or Sunday so you can visit the massive Chatuchuk market. Avoid peak hours – between 7.30-9am and 5-7pm, though Bangkok’s notorious traffic is always bad. Tuk tuks are often the better bet, as the little motorised carts weave in and out of the traffic where taxis can’t go, though you need some idea of prices as they are unmetered and, in many cases, unscrupulous.

Our hotel, the Conrad Bangkok’s solution is its new, black and very, very shiny Easy Rider mopeds. We climbed on board and powered off into the pumping city streets, complete with little Conrad flag fluttering behind us. The hotel’s cheery concierge, Jack, helped us plan our assault on the city’s streets also shared his hot shopping tips: Food Loft above CentralWorld for great city views and brilliant budget food, Chinatown for gold, gold and more gold, and in a city pumping with tailors, he plumped for Embassy Fashion which thought nothing of whipping up a bespoke suit and shirt in three days, complete with two fittings.

Markets

Chatuchak Weekend Market, possibly the biggest flea market in South-East Asia, is pure budget overload. There is method to the madness: the 10,000 stalls are split into 26 sections and each soi (street) is numbered, so grab a map and find your groove, from the large second-hand clothing section (think second-hand Levis and far too many Che and Bob Marley t-shirts) to silk sellers, jewellery, handbags galore and a pet section of fluffy dogs and weird reptiles. There are food stands throughout and cafes serving strong iced coffee. Open to the public on Saturdays and Sundays, the fastest and cheapest way out is by Skytrain.

The night bazaar of Suan Lom, set in Lumpini Park, is a one-stop shop with a massive open-air food hall where you’re serenaded by Thai singing popettes, but expect to pay well above most other markets and the choices are limited. Its location makes it a good evening outing for those staying in Sukhumvit or Silom, but word is its days are limited as the area is zoned for redevelopment.

Surrounded by deep-fried insects, buckets o’ beer and frog noisemakers pushed upon you by Thai hill tribe touts? You must be in Khao Sarn Road, Bangkok’s (and quite possibly the whole of Asia’s) beating backpacker heart. We found this season’s beach fashions on the streets at prices not too dissimilar to that of other markets, and the sellers are, like, totally over it, so you’re saved the hard sell. Pirate DVDs and CDs are freshly burned in a nearby back alleyway while you wait. Best to go when the sun goes down and the party warms up.

And finally, the notorious Patpong Night Markets are in the seediest part of town. The grunge is real, but all the designer watches, luggage and sunnies are as fake as spray-on tan. The stalls share the broken footpaths with drunks, lechers and pimps for steamy girlie shows – expect to see punters in raunchy ping-pong clubs brandishing faux Louis Vuitton carry-alls. Hugely overpriced, the sellers are punting on your intoxication and newness to the city to make their living.

Department Stores

The strip between the Skytrain (BTS) stops of Siam and Ploen Chit on Sukhumvit Rd is the hub of Bangkok’s department stores, from low-rent to labels. Most have shopping discount cards for tourists –ask for yours at the main information desk.

It’s loud, it’s slightly tacky, it pumps from 10am to 10pm – what’s not to love about MBK? This massive department store is five levels of power; new and used mobile phones and electronic gadgetry cover one level alone, discount sparkly heels from around £3.50 are commonplace, and a great little beautician, Nice Face, on the fifth level, does a pumping trade in express pedicures and facials from about £2.50. Fotofile, a camera shop on the ground floor sells bargain lenses, and the knock-down cosmetics on level 4 are worth careful scrutiny.

We loved the fact that the elite Erawan department store , which boasts such labels as Burberry and the US leather brand Coach, has its feet well and truly grounded by the Erawan temple and shrine at its entrance. Temple dancers perform abeyances and devotees leave offerings of food and fruit to the shrine while the beautiful people push past to get into the designer galleries. Linked by overhead walkways, you can skip directly across to the equally chic Gaysorn for more labels, including Gucci, Pucci, Prada and friends. Expect your Rolex to be noted for the fake that it is.

CentralWorld is another great stop on this strip – in particular, the hip Zen store-within-a-store, which includes a strip of small, independent Thai fashion designers such as the girly Living Doll and Pretty Little Things. The popular Thai skincare brand, Thann, is also here, as is its aromatherapy sister, Harnn. The 17th to 19th stores are pegged for a new rooftop restaurant concept, due to open in September. CentralWorld is linked to its sister property, Central Chit Lom, by overhead walkways through the Chit Lom BTS station.

Much lower down the food chain is Platinum Fashion Mall, on the corner of Radchadamri Rd. Be still, beating heart, this is bargain central. There are two prices, the retail price (if you’re buying one or two pieces) or the wholesale price, nearly half the price, if you buy more than three pieces at a time. Few shops will let you try stuff on before buying. Check out the great costume jewellery at Loom (Room 252, 1st floor) from around $1. Beware, the mall closes around 6.30pm.

Don’t be in such a rush you miss the street stalls on Radchadamri Rd – we saw cut-price knits bearing Zara and H&M labels for 200b (£3.75) and Chanel, Bobbi Brown and Mac compacts, lipstick and eyeshadow sets from a tiny 80b (£1.50). Stallholders say, cryptically, they come from Korea.... we’re not sure what that means, either. Also up this end of town is Geek Nirvana, aka Pantip Plaza, on Petchaburi Rd, open 10am-8.30pm daily, an IT hypermarket with the cheapest dodgy software as well as computer gear, MP3 players and anything powered by a USB cord.

Breakout

Thai speciality shopping

Jim Thompson is one of Thailand’s top silk retailers and now has outlets across the city. Check the beautifully boxed silk ties.

Doitung is the Queen’s pet fair-trade project which sells silk works produced by the country’s impoverished hill tribes. There are shops at Siam Square shopping mall near and in Suan Lom night market. Also in on the act is HRH Princess Maha, whose Phufa shops aim to create self-sustaining communities through their production of fabrics, food and handicrafts. There’s one at the entrance of Chatuchak markets.

The fifth floor at Central Chit Lom has a comprehensive Thai local products section including Panpuri teas, Erb spa products, high-grade woven silk products and the Doitung range.

Trip Notes

Getting around: Bangkok is serviced by an underground rail line (MRT) and the Skytrain (BTS), taxis are cheap and plentiful (check the meter is on), while tuk tuks are fun, but require negotiation on the price. Taxis turn off their meters and prices double in peak hours.

When to go: Shopping hours are lovely and long, with many stores open from 10am-10pm, and night markets even later. The big department stores open on Sundays.