Egypt for Beginners by Paul Rouse
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Even if your experience of the country goes no further than a visit to the British Museum or watching a National Geographic documentary, you’ll almost certainly have a picture in your mind’s eye... the Pyramids, the Sphinx, the face of Tutankhamun, the minarets of the Cairo skyline, the biblical serenity of the Nile, the teeming marine life of the Red Sea.
Egypt is where Europe, Africa and the Middle East not so much meet as collide head-on, and where the modern world converges with the developing one, often in sharp contrast. Even for the experienced traveller therefore, it can sometimes be seen as daunting, with a number of perceived negatives, from the food and the water to the traffic, the poverty, and the issue of safety and security.
With careful planning and a practical approach however, there’s absolutely no reason why - providing you maintain a sense of humour and perspective - you shouldn’t enjoy every single minute.
I adore the place. Egypt is quite unlike anywhere else, and the experiences will come thick and fast. Waking up to a view of the Pyramids from your bedroom at the Mena House Oberoi. Haggling in the souk at Khan al-Khalili. Camel rides in the Sahara or Sinai. Hot air ballooning over the Valley of the Kings. Belly dancing, smoking a sheesha, or taking tea with the Bedouins. Following in the footsteps of Ramses, Cleopatra, Saladin, Napoleon and Agatha Christie.
And whilst it can have its challenges, that’s surely part of the thrill. If you want second-hand adventure, go to a theme park. If you want the real thing, go to Egypt.
So what are the do’s and don’ts of visiting Egypt, the must-see sights and the I-wish-I-hadn’t-bothereds, the lowdown on how to come back from your trip, not with a dodgy tummy or a tacky camel souvenir, but as a complete Egyptophile, with indelible memories and the desire to return?
The Nile
Home to the Ancient Egypt we all read about in school - Luxor, Karnak, Thebes and the extraordinary discoveries of Howard Carter and Lord Carnarvon.
Unmissable:
1) Luxor and Karnak Temples (the latter at night, for a spine-tingling Sound & Light show), a ride in a horse-drawn caleche along the Corniche (agree a price first), and afternoon tea at the Winter Palace Hotel.
2) A boat trip across to the West Bank by traditional felucca to one of the world’s most astonishing archaeological sites: Thebes, the Valley of the Kings, the Valley of the Queens, Hatshepsut Temple and the Colossi of Memnon. Get a preview by booking a dawn balloon trip the day before, to take it all in from the perfect vantage point. Unforgettable. And definitely worth the early start.
3) A Nile cruise, from Luxor down to Aswan: timeless scenery at a serene pace, without the hassle of unpacking. Visit the incredible temples at Esna, Edfu, Kom Ombo and Philae, and then, in Aswan, the Old Cataract Hotel, the Nubian Museum, the Unfinished Obelisk and Kitchener’s Island.
4) A day visit (by plane) to Abu Simbel to see the Great Temple of Ramses II – gob-smacking, and the perfect end to any holiday. You won’t top it.
What not to see:
Frankly, my dear... you can probably give the Aswan Dam a miss. And avoid temple-fatigue, trying to see too much in one trip. You’ll be back.
When to go: October to April.
Top tips:
1) Don’t expect to see fabulous treasures in situ in the tombs – they’re all on show in the Egyptian Museum in Cairo. Visit it first.
2) If you’re booking into the famous Old Cataract or the Winter Palace, make sure to specify rooms in the historic parts, not the characterless modern annexes.
3) Accommodation standards on Nile cruise boats are reasonable, but “Egyptian five-star” often equates to three-star on an international scale. And the food is average tourist fare. Ask the chef to prepare some Egyptian/Arabic specialities for you.
The Red Sea
Immensely popular as a year-round and value-for-money holiday destination, with a profusion of hotels, leisure facilities and resorts. Hurghada, on the mainland coast, and Sharm El Sheikh, on the tip of the Sinai Peninsula, are both well-established, with internationally-branded hotels and vibrant nightlife. The Red Sea is one of the best locations anywhere for shore-based diving and snorkelling - and guaranteed winter sun.
Unmissable:
1) If you want to learn to dive, you’ll never get a better chance. The coral reefs and the underwater life are spectacular, and the Red Sea’s a lot warmer than your local quarry. Look for a fully qualified PADI instructor.
2) Wreck-diving for serious enthusiasts, shallow lagoons for first-time snorkellers, and windsurfing, parasailing, water-skiing, fishing, sailing and cruising for just about anybody.
3) Tear yourself away from the beach for an excursion to Cairo, Mount Sinai - where Moses was said to have been given the Ten Commandments – or St. Catherine’s Monastery. Built on the reputed site of the Burning Bush, it was commissioned by Emperor Justinian and is the oldest Christian monastery in continuous existence.
What not to see:
There’s little traditional Egyptian culture here. A Bedouin village reached by camel ride from Sharm is about as good as it gets.
When to go: September to June.
Top tips:
1) The tourist shops in most Red Sea resorts are mainly full of mass-produced tack. If you’re looking for quality, and genuine bargains, save your money for Cairo or the established souks along the Nile.
2) The best time to visit Mount Sinai is at dawn, when the first rays of the sun illuminate the surrounding desert, with stunning views over the Gulf of Aqaba.
Cairo
You have to find time to add on a trip to Egypt’s capital - busy, noisy, crowded, polluted and yet totally absorbing. Internal flights (by EgyptAir) are functional, but leave at ungodly hours. The overnight train takes longer but at least you’ll get a good night’s rest. It’s not the Orient-Express, but a bottle of gin and a pack of wet-wipes will get you through.
Unmissable:
1) The Pyramids, the only surviving Ancient Wonder of the World and breathtaking in size and scope.
2) Best views of the city are from Cairo Tower, on Zamalek Island, or The Citadel, a hilltop collection of mosques, museums and battlements from the days of Saladin.
3) The Egyptian Museum, home to countless treasures from ancient Egypt including Tutankhamun’s legendary funeral mask.
4) Khan al-Khalili souk, offering great bargains. All human life is here.
What not to see:
The Sound & Light show at the Pyramids: tinny music, unimpressive strobes and a confusing storyline. When to go: September to June.
Top tips:
2) Get your hotel concierge to organise you a taxi for the day: a cost-effective and hassle-free way of getting around.
3) See the Pyramids at their best, and avoid the crowds, by going at sunrise or sunset.
Walk like an Egyptian: a Survival Guide
Hotels:
Rates are incredibly competitive, and upgrades to a suite or room with a view are well worth it. For real atmosphere, try the Mena House Oberoi or the Cairo Marriott.
Hiring a car:
Don’t even think about it. Use taxis or caleches.
Children:
Wait until they’re studying Egypt at school before you take them. Not a destination for babies and toddlers.
Haggling:
The national sport and good fun. Start low and don’t be afraid of walking away if the price isn’t right.
Begging:
The other national sport. Don’t be tempted by demands for ‘baksheesh’ unless it’s a tip. Once you start...
Water:
Always drink bottled water - and make sure the seal is intact. Avoid ice in your drinks and keep your mouth closed in the shower. The chemicals won’t kill you but the after-taste might ruin breakfast.
Food:
Do try hummus, babaghanoush, koshari and lentil soup. Delicious. Be wary of salads and ice cream. And peel your own fruit.
Recommended non-hotel restaurants:
La Bodega and the original Felfela. Drink:
With the exception of the Gianaclis brands, most Egyptian wine is poor stuff, whilst imported wine is expensive. Stick to the refreshing local beers, Stella and Sakara.