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If you've ever dreamed of re-enacting the cliff climb from of The Guns of Navarone, but within walking distance of a decent coffee, (pretty much my climbing aspirations and limitations), then the Viennese are there to help you. In 1943-4 Hitler ordered the construction of six 34-metre high, reinforced-concrete flak-gun emplacements to defend Vienna against air-raids. He bragged that the stark, hulking monoliths with their corner gun emplacements would last 4,000 years. And that might be one of the few things he was ever right about. Though the actual guns have gone, all post-war attempts to demolish the massive towers have failed dismally and the Viennese have had to look into new uses for them.

The Esterházy Flakturm, right in the city centre on Esterházypark, has been the most successfully rehabilitated of the towers. One vast outside wall is painted with cartoons to enliven the kindergarten below, and the tower's nine-storey interior has been turned into the city's aquarium. But of most interest to closet Anthony Quinns, with bootblack on their faces and a coil of rope over the shoulder, is the south wall which has been studded with artificial climbing routes up its full height, whilst the lower half of the west wall has been given over to bouldering slabs and crash mats.

Attempts to climb the tower were first made in the 60s, using the roughness of the concrete surface and the few reinforcing wires poking out on one face. Despite being in the land of tiger Alpinists, the Flakturm remained unconquered. Until, that is, handholds and belays were bolted on in the late 90s, giving 20 routes to the top, ranging from 4 to 8 in difficulty, and including two that continue out under the 4-metre, 90° overhang at the rim high above the median Viennese horizon.

For twenty minutes I watched Tibor, Stefan and Thomas, three students from Linz, go through every combination of spidering up, peeling off, touching top and abseiling down. They were having fun. Tibor offered to take my camera up to take a penthouse view of the surrounding city. "Lend me a pair of stickys, belay me and I’ll give it a shot myself," I countered. As I began climbing it did occur to me that all my very new friends had to do was wait until I was ten metres up, tie-off the rope and walk away with my passport, cameras, wallet and everything else I’d left in my daypack. But, then, climbing is all about trust, eh?

The handholds fell easily beneath my hands and feet, conclusive proof that I and my rusty climbing skills were on one of the easy routes. Turning my head as I continued up I was able to look through the windows of the ritzy flats in the baroque buildings across the street, discovering that the higher the Viennese live the smarter and more expensive their chattels get. The folks on the fifth floor had very nice furniture indeed.

There was the surreal knowledge that on the other side of the wall, admittedly the very thick wall, that I was scaling there were sharks, conger eels and guppies swimming lengths of their tanks inside the Haus des Meeres. A large air vent at face level spewed forth a fishy miasma into the drizzly evening. If I closed my eyes I could imagine I was back climbing on St David's Head in Wales at very, very low tide. Or inching my way up Navarone, perhaps. I went a few more holds, took a three-point stance and looked over my shoulder at the surrounding rooftops. Well, some of them anyway. Plenty of others rooftops were higher than I was prepared to climb.

In fact I was feeling a bit more David Niven than Gregory Peck. "Rope!" I hollered down at Tibor, trying to remember what the word for 'rope' was in German. He took the slack anyway and I launched myself off the wall and abseiled down to the ground in great bounds. I'd been out-gunned on the Flakturm and there was no stirring film soundtrack to herald my return to street level. But, hey, there was still time to pull down my Homburg and take a drink in the Cafe Sperl with the ‘Third Man,’ before heading into the sewers to the accompaniment of frantically hammered zithers. Vienna; capital city of filmic heights and lows.

INFO BOX
THE CLIMBING WALL
The Kletterturm ('climbing tower') Esterházypark is open from April to October, from 14.00 on weekdays and from 13.00 on weekends through to darkness.

Climbing and bouldering courses run most evenings. Though the bouldering routes and crash mats are usually crowded, the climbing wall is less used and has more space.

Admission costs less if you have your own insurance through membership of the BMA, CAP or similar - bring proof and you've got two hours to storm the guns. Ropes, karabiners, helmets and climbing shoes can be hired by the hour.

For more information tel: 5854748 (English spoken depending on who's manning the phone). If either your German or guesswork is good it's worth looking at the Flakturm website: www.oeav-events.at/flakturm. Email: kletterzentrum.flakturm @ oeav-events.at

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