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Spend a day in Milan and you’re left with no doubt as to why Rossini’s compositions are prestissimo. The Italian capital of business and fashion, Milan is the country’s engine room; fuelled by lofty ambitions and a generous shot of caffeine (a velvety smooth cappuccino or espresso, naturalmente). Their hard-working streak may make the Milanese seem brusque, or even dour, compared to the southern Italy of languid lunchtimes and steamy embraces on narrow ledges – but this is far from the truth.

Milan is, in fact, genuinely Italian in many of its impulses. To be Milanese is to revel in worldly pleasures. Cinema and theatre flourish here (the annual opening of the opera season at La Scala on Dec 7 is still the place to strut in your best designer stuff), food and the good grape are the lubricator of life, and shopping bears a quasi-religious significance. Yet in several important ways, the Milanese set themselves apart from their warm-blooded southern cousins. Although wild gesticulation and 24-hour flirtation is still de rigueur, the Italian urgency of speech – that makes the speaker sound as if he or she is begging for a kidney transplant – is markedly less pronounced, as is the Italian cult of the child, perhaps unsurprising in a city blessed with few great parks, but any number of drivers who control their cars as if they’ve slumped dead on the throttle.

To live Milan like the Milanese do, forget any notions of floating through your morning on a magic carpet ride of cappuccino and panettone. To be a modern Milanese, you need to work off all of last night’s pasta and fine wine at the gym, and that means a 6.30am start. Being buff is very much a preoccupation of 21st-century Milan, perhaps unsurprising for a city that exists at the axis of business and fashion. Skorpion (Corso Vittorio Emanuele) and Cavoli Health (t/c) are two of the most famous, but Get Fit (the trendy new gym in Via Ravizza) is the spot where you should air your well-pressed spandex in the evening (gyms, more than bars, are where the Milanese prowl for dates).

After all of that energy expenditure, you’ll deserve a rest. One of the trendiest places to while away a couple of daytime hours in Milan (and all day if you like, as it’s possible to segue from cappuccino to lunch and early evening aperitif in the same spot) is Fioraio Bianchi Caffè (Via Montebello, 7). The caffè was recently converted from a flower shop, and is as famous for its extravagant blooms and floral scent as it is for the comic surliness of the manager.

Flea and food markets are the great leveler in Milan, with all social strata converging on Milan’s cobbled streets in the morning to buy goods, from a cornucopia of fresh fruit and veg, to handbags and chalky hunks of white cheese, so this is the next stop. There are markets every day in different areas across the city: San Marco, near the Brera quadrangle, has a famous bi-weekly market, whereas Navigli stages a vast weekend antiques mercatone, on the first or second Sunday of the month, check ciaomilano.it for dates.

There are several very distinct methods of Milanese lunching. For the archetypal 10 euro lunch, it has to be a pizza. Pizza Biagio (20 Via Vinzo Monti) is unbeatable if your taste is for the thick, doughy, Neapolitan variety that’s conquered much of Italy. However, if you prefer the Milanese-style thin and crispy pizza, known in local dialect as ‘elephant ear’, try husband and wife operation Rita and Antonio in Via San Giovanni sul Muro. If you have more time to lunch, join the well-dressed Milanese ladies idling over their primi e secondi platti in the very typical Cova (Via Montenapoleone). Young Milano business types will generally opt for a 30-minute ‘diet compliant’ lunch in a slick Caffè, such as the minimalist Armani Caffè, or in the white-hot Da Claudio (Via Ponte Vetero). Da Claudio is a fishmonger turned innovative ‘Italian sushi’ bar that serves herbed raw fish with oil and fresh lemon to the ravenous city workers who flank their counter. If you’re really pushed for time, try De Santis on Corso Magenta, a sandwich shop with Milanese panache – their truffle, ostrich and foie gras sarnies are famous city-wide.

The frothy topping to the espresso shot of Milanese commerce is undoubtedly fashion, and Milan is famously (and debatably) second only to Paris on the world fashion map. The streets of Milan are coagulated with air-kissing world style-setters every February, for Milan fashion week. As any Milano resident will tell you, the surest sign of the arrival of fashion week are the throngs of Milanese boys on motorbikes tailing map-toting catwalk models with their cries of ‘ciao bella’ and offers of assistance. The flagships of all of the great Italian brands – Dolce e Gabanna, Armani, Versace – are based in Milan.

However, for an insight into Milanese fashion fetishism, you should try the boutiques hidden away in apartments, such as the shoe heaven Le Soulier de Satin (Via Formentini). Much like trying on exquisite shoes over a cappuccino with friends, Le Soulier will require a friendly wallet too. Or pamper yourself for less at Madina (Corso Venezia), a make-up shop that’s a fairytale palace of ice-cream hues, they’ll even make you up for free. In the late afternoon (except on Monday, when the shops close) join the shoppers spilling out of the Galleria Vittorio Emmanuele II, an awe-inspiring shopping arcade built in the nineteenth century, its vaulted glass dome and mosaics a sharp contrast to the brisk business conducted by McDonalds and Swarovski inside. Perhaps munch on a bag of roast chestnuts and take am afternoon passeggiata in the Palazzo Reale, which houses the Duomo, the breathtaking gothic cathedral that symbolizes Milan. Or, those with more youthful concerns could congregate in the nearby Corso Vittorio Emmanuele, a brightly lit shopping strip that’s a stomping ground for teens.

If you only have time to sample one Milanese custom, it has to be aperitifs, or post-work/pre-dinner drinks. A boon to those holidaying on a budget, at this hour bars lay out a range of snack foods, from pastries, to olives and mini cocktail sandwiches, to be enjoyed gratis with your drink, Nobu, in the great Armani megalith on Via Manzoni is popular at this hour, as is the slick Marino alla Scala, which overlooks the famous opera house’s carved edifice. For dinner, the Milanese are currently loosening their traditions and well-knotted neck scarves, and falling in love with conceptual dining. Boquon De Vino (check on Bouquon t/c), in Corso Magenta pairs wines with your course (with around five wines offered during a three-course meal). Or try the white-hot Teatro 7, in Corso Como to the north-west of Central Milan. Como is becoming renowned for its edgy operations, and Teatro 7 is no exception, the kitchen built next to the dining tables and separated by a crystal partition, unique in Milan.

As the caramel light of evening Milan dips over its characterful, centuries-old facades, and a mischievous Milanese night draws in, seek out some nightlife in the fashionable Brera area, with the fluttering canopies of its lively bars and caffès and winding cobbled streets (try the Soul II Soul on Moscova just to the north, or the Jazz Café on Via Brera itself). Just remember to perfect that Milanese swagger. And ladies, don’t be too surprised if those floppy haired Milanese boys trump you for pretty good looks.

Pass yourself off as Milanese

Remember that pasta isn’t simply pasta. Before lunchtime an order of the same will produce pastries, commonly brioche.

After-dinner caffeine is resolutely in the form of an espresso. The order of a nighttime cappuccino, in particular, will be met with unconcealed derision.

Take a tram ride. The orange Carelli trams have been a much-treasured fixture in Milan since they were introduced in 1910. Often, local passengers take an active role in keeping them moving.

Remember there is no reason employed when parking, or crossing roads. The Milanese happily reverse their cars into a parking space the size of a handkerchief.

A quick glance at local TTV will confirm the fact that the solidity of one’s hairdo is directly proportional to age.

Every Milanese woman should own a fabulous, simple black dress, a tailored suit jacket and a crisp white shirt.

Shades are not merely for protecting the delicate ocular organs organs against the harsh rays of the sun, but should be worn year-round.

Remember: to have true personality, cars should be minuscule. Sadly, the tiny Fiat Cinquecento, which long defined Milan’s streets, couldn’t be brought up-to-date with exhaust regulations (although its admirers are still lobbying the EU). It’s modern counterpart, cropping up all over the city, is the Smart Car.

Hate Juventous. AC and Inter Milan football fans unite in their hatred of the Turin team.

Coordinate, coordinate, coordinate. Even into your 70s, there’s no excuse for shoddiness in this department. Brown trousers = brown shoes and handbag (but remember the accent accessory).

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