Review of Apex Waterloo Place, by Vitali Vitaliev

Apex Waterloo Place in Edinburgh carries the elusive spirit of the famous (if fictitious) Edinburgh resident Deacon Brodie (the prototype of Stevenson’s Dr Jekyll/Mr Hyde), for it is not what it appears at a first glance. To begin with, it is not actually new: the building used to house Edinburgh’s first purpose-built hotel, and Charles Dickens, allegedly, stayed there in 1861.

From the exterior, the building looks much smaller that it actually is: the building's position on Carlton Hill means four floors are below reception level overlooking Leith Street, and the uppermost and the most luxurious one, the tenth, is deliberately concealed from the prying eyes of pedestrians by the overhanging roof cornice.

Let’s enter the ground floor reception on level 5(!) of this Tardis of a hotel where arriving guests are subjected to a prompt electronic check-in and to signing (also electronic) of a “spa disclaimer”… Formalities over, it’s time for miracles to begin!

For me, they start inside my Gordon Junior suite – one of the hotel’s 187 rooms and suites. Each of the suite’s two rooms has a large-screen plasma satellite TV and a DVD player. On bedside tables on both sides of the bed of a truly Siberian vastness (yet with none of the chill), there’s an iPod station which I initially mistake for an ashtray (smoking is strictly forbidden anywhere inside the hotel).
 
The bed is piled with dozens of cute huggable cushions of all shapes, sizes and colours. Each of the two writing desks doubles as a dressing table, with foldable hidden mirrors inside. A state-of-the art Krups espresso machine is winking its mischievous green eye ready for action. I am also thrilled to spot a quality clothes brush in the cupboard – an indispensable object one can rarely find even in the most luxurious hotel rooms – the fact that made me once suggest to grade hotels by brushes rather than stars.

Flower pots with orchids decorate the bathroom, with designer sea kelp toiletries on shelves. Other rooms in the hotel are no less comfortable and guest-friendly in an ingenious and welcoming way. So, also, is the windowless Yu Spa with a small pool in the basement (on level 3!). When you get fed up with the pool, move to the ground floor Bar (on level 5, no doubt!) and enjoy a fondue selection.

The last – but not least – secret is on the hotel’s lowest basement floor: a hidden exit straight into Waverley train station which otherwise would take you a brisk ten-minute walk to reach. A touch of Houdini, no less…

Apex Waterloo Place was one of the quirkiest and best hotels I’ve ever stayed at. What a twist!