Santiburi Resort, Koh Samui, Thailand

"How to escape all the other the escapists?" is the question. It’s a terminally romantic fantasy, of course — a holiday away from everyone else who’s on a holiday away — but the Santiburi Resort on the north coast of Thailand’s Koh Samui island comes close. Pick a beachfront New Santiburi Villa here and you have three fine rooms and a private, open air plunge pool. Your great indoors (plenty of marble, golden teak and a ripping sound system) open out to even greater domains of palmy glades and views of floating islands. Right at your doorstep is Mae Nam beach, a shore less trammelled by hawkers and trinketeers.

Spend an afternoon in the spa being polished, revived and pacified. Next, the Sala Thai restaurant lays out the mother of all meals, a Royal Thai degustation feast. After the first half-dozen courses I lose count, but the red snapper, tom kha gai and banana flower salad are standouts, not to mention the scrumptious ginger ice cream. A beachfront Santiburi Villa's most romantic feature is as follows: tumble out of bed at midnight or mid-day, grab your partner by the hand, take six paces and slip into the ocean; sometime later amble back for a double-dip skinny-dip in your own private plunge pool.

Certain travelling companions may find that even such lazing, feasting and dipping isn’t enough. For them a truly romantic pursuit involves chasing not their partner but — unbelievably — a little white ball around the green, green grass of Samui. If your squeeze is one of these, don’t even mention the new Santiburi Country Club golf course.

The few "must-do's" on Samui are more like "might-do's". Most visitors head at some time to the island's most popular attraction, the Big Buddha at Wat Phra Yai. This fifteen metre, golden statue has sat here for 30 years and while its bulk is impressive, don't expect meditative solemnity; the forecourt is noisy with music, stalls and snack bars. Samui's more unusual "might-do's" include a mummified monk, a coral Buddha and a snake farm where the curious, if not dubious, side-shows include centipede and scorpion fights.

Unlike Samui's celebrated beach towns of Chaweng and Lamai, the north coast village of Bophut has retained its distinctly Thai character. Down the narrow main street a food vendor moves from door-to-door, her wares slung on a balance pole. Bophut's success, too, is much about balancing, in this case of tradition with tourism. Its shorefront main street is still lined by old, two-storey teak shophouses, with many of them now enjoying a new lease of life as cafes, bars, a day spa and lodges. Elsewhere, the island is quiet, mountainous, green and impeccably clean. There's a good around-island road to get you to any number of hideaway bays and low-key resorts. Self-driving on Samui is a breeze.